Says Walt Whitman in Song of Myself, “Do I contradict myself? Very well then I contradict myself, (I am large, I contain multitudes).”
Do we ever. We contain multitudes not only because we are creative, expansive and excited. We contain them because we are also propelled by the processing of systemic intelligence that by today’s social standards seems ruthless and raw.
Our brains, built over millions of years, include instincts that are neither rational nor conciliatory. In turn, fearful, passionate, ruthless, poised to fight or flee, these impulses challenge our ability to manage our lives in the sophisticated world we live in. They can contradict our best intentions or our best laid plans. In one minute, we are settled and satisfied. In the next minute, we’ll find ourselves agitated, presumably by a random, fleeting thought.
Actually, the situation is even more complex. Our bodily operations, most of which we are not consciously aware, are self-regulating. They stir us to activity—to sleep, to eat, to move, to “perk up our ears” or go on alert. Language—a relatively recent evolutionary possibility—allows us to assign a cause to such stirring. For example, we might say that the neighbor’s constantly barking dog made us angry. However, systemic activity may have preceded the thought.
And, of course, there is the “external” conflict. People—politicians, neighbors, religious leaders, mates, children and employees, to name just a few—have ideas, desires or beliefs that don’t match our own. Each tries to prevail, just as we do. Our interests make sense to us. But they aren’t ipso facto worthier than those of others.
I think we’re lucky to have so much scientific information about our living systems. Better to know that our uncivilized, conflict-causing impulses are wired into our brain than to think that we’re cursed. And we’re lucky to have so much sociological information about how human beings predictably, but not necessarily rationally, interact with each other.
Still, the best we can do is to move with as much grace and athleticism as possible BETWEEN Whitman’s “multitudes,” the rhythms and chemicals that give shape to our lives AND the culturally acquired and accepted means for their expression. From this perspective and position, we put together a modus vivendi that will enable us to show up productively and responsibly and to experience a meaningful life.
Arnold Siegel is the founder of Autonomy and life and leader of its Retreat Workshops and Advanced Classes.