The holidays are over. Back to the future. Once again we turn our attention to our responsibility for living a life of our own design.
We are drawn (perhaps naturally, certainly normatively) to America’s concept of a rewarding life. As I said in my post titled, Your mind is a window to your soul, we typically identify with convention and measure ourselves by its standards. As such, we want to have a functional stake in this productive society. Luckier than many who have no such opportunity, we have found a place, staked a claim, so to speak. It is the means to satisfy many of our objectives. And, at the same time, it is a contribution.
Basic to America’s concept of a rewarding life is the autonomous imperative. We are bred to this demand, expected to be responsible, self-reliant, self-controlled, resilient and to fit in financially and socially.
Still, in most cases, in the workplace and on the home front, the rules are written, the lines drawn, the competition for position and reward merciless and the punishments for mistakes swiftly allocated. In the best-case scenario, our temperaments and critical resources are a comfortable match for the conventions that prevail on-site. In a less desirable scenario, the fit is an uneasy one. We don’t have the skill-set demanded by the job itself or we don’t like the circumstances in which we must work.
In either case, it’s the future we have in mind. We have work to do, commitments to keep, results to produce, conflicts to resolve and, in some jobs, business to generate. The call for innovation, flexibility and adaptation never ends.
I think it is realistic to look at our situation in terms of our responsibilities—explicitly stated by contract or implied. Indeed, the self-motivated drive for increased responsibility is the well-worn pathway to success.
Responsibility has a symbiotic relationship with credibility. How seriously we are taken is determined by how well we execute our responsibilities. Causal efficacy is crucial. If we’re not doing what we said we would do, we fail professionally and personally.
This means, on the one hand, that we should explore our creative and strategic resources—dream, stretch, extend ourselves. On the other hand, it means that we should not overestimate our competence and reach too far. Life is miserable if we’re "in over our heads."
To all of this challenge and convention, we bring our best and most decent selves. Part and parcel of our sentience and systemic intelligence is our spontaneous and experiencing nature. Also, we know and recognize our predicament in the present play of our minds. In short, we wish to be fit for all of life, free and cooperative, agile and stable, steadfast and adaptable and knowledgeable of this: That it mattered that we came to be born if it mattered to those we served with our work and our care and concern.
Are you interested in having more autonomy in your life?
Here's a plan of action! Examine our website. If you find it interesting, do the Retreat Workshop. If your interest continues, do our Advanced Classes. Thank you.
Arnold Siegel is the founder of Autonomy and Life and the leader of its Retreat Workshops and Advanced Classes.